I will remain calm.

I am not freaking out.

But I would forgive myself if I did freak out. You see, I was at the supermarket fish counter, turned my head, and saw this:

…and I threw up a little bit in my mouth.

Not because it’s a crazy Texas cowboy Santa with a cactus and a penguin, but because I am NOT READY to deal with Christmas yet.

By this time last year, I had already:

• – mixed up new Christmas music playlists
• – put together a Christmas party outfit
• – selected the Christmas-ey scent for my home
• – bought my Christmas cards
• – selected gifts for the nieces and nephews
• – I was very close to buying a tree and decorating
• – photoshopped my dogs to look like reindeer
• – had a plan for wrapping and shipping everything off to our family and friends

But mostly, I had:

KNIT MORE THAN TWELVE CHRISTMAS GIFTS, and I did it all without ever stepping into a mall.

Clearly, Christmas is going to be different this year. Not bad, but different.

Just as long as I don’t freak out because I can’t be Martha Stewart this time.

Instead of wool and alpaca and cotton and silk, my attention has been focused on other materials – namely cardboard and tape.

	And a black magic marker, of course.
	The art of knitting has been replaced by the art of stacking and lifting…
	And sorting, and sorting, and sorting. Packing and moving is one thing…but inspecting every single item to decide whether it’s “his” or “hers” is time consuming. I’m not complaining. It’s actually sort of cleansing.
	Speaking of cleansing, my closet positively echoes right now. “Big picture” details soon.
	The dogs and I have a deal. As long as I move the dog beds around the house to follow the sun, they won’t unpack what I’ve packed. Win win!

Sometimes even an emotionally stable person can’t avoid baby talk.

Especially in the presence of so many tiny, cute things.

	First up, my niece. This is Molly Renee at 10 weeks with her mom (aka my sister). Recently, someone on the street mistook Molly for a boy. Since then, Phyllis has been careful to cover her in pink and bows. A boy? Really? Only in Alaska.
	Next little, cute thing – these tiny mittens. I made these as a shop sample for The Knitting Nest, to help show off the Baby Ull yarn. I love this pattern, so much that this isn’t the first pair of these mittens I’ve knit.
	Yet another cute thing…here is the Baby Surprise Sweater I knit a few weeks ago, but this time with buttons. The buttons aren’t actually attached yet in this photo.
	Are you about to reach your limit on little cute things? I wasn’t going to take a photo of Little Lou’s head, but he got curious about what I was doing. The sweater is my latest WIP, Basic Black from the new MagKnits, knit with Lorna’s Laces Shepherd Sport in Chocolate.
	Little Lou again, looking kind of huge from this angle.

Tenth Clapotis = fini.

As much as I like the pattern, I’d still like to think that this will be my last one.

	Pretty, huh? While I was knitting it, I was thinking, “Man, I’d sure like to have one for myself out of this yarn.” Could somebody lock me up, please?
	This one was made with 2.5 hanks of Lorna’s Laces Shepherd Sport. The drape on it is perfect and lovely and it smells good, and it is my new BFF. I WANT. Ravelry details.
	Enough of that. Here’s Gus, from a photo shoot I had with him a few days ago. (He’s laying next to the destroyed dog bed.) Isn’t this called “Rembrandt Lighting”?

A fast-topic-changing Friday! It should be in title caps! A Fast-Topic-Changing Friday!

First up, mini trampolines (aka trampettes, rebounders) were constantly bouncing into my field of vision, which made me want to give one a try.

	A trip to the sports store and $19.99 later, I had me one. It is so fun! It’s jogging and bouncing, without pressure on the joints. In fact, there are a whole host of benefits to be found on the very trustworthy Online, including happier lymphatic circulation. Who knew? I like the fact that I can place it directly in front of the tv and bounce to The People’s Court.
	Abe likes it, too. Next…!
	Could it be? Might I be knitting my TENTH Clapotis? Yes. It’s a shop/class sample for The Knitting Nest. I might hold the world’s record for Clapotis. If anyone knows of a knitter who has made more of these than me, please let me know. Next…!
	I got the coolest free gift. I happen to order all of my skincare from a certain website (I’ll tell ya if you really want to know), and they were having a “free cocktail ring with purchase of $1.4 million dollars” or so. I’m a sucker for free gifts. I’ve actually been looking for a ring like this! And it’s really metal, and it’s just my size. But it gets even better…
	Lip gloss! Next…!
	Here is proof that I feed my dogs things other than mini trampolines and Harry Potter scarves. Here they are enjoying a nice bowl of Froot Loops for dinner. Have a great weekend!

Next up in sample knits for The Knitting Nest – a project that happens to also be the household Halloween costume.

All four dogs are going as Harry Potter this year. I didn’t give them a choice.

	This sample is for a class I’ll teach for beginners who can already knit and purl, to give them skills in double-knitting, changing colors, k2tog, finishing, and blocking. These are Gryffindor colors, even though I was sorted as a Ravenclaw. If you haven’t been sorted into your house yet, this test is pretty cool.
	My guess is that Gus would actually be sorted into Slytherin, which explains his discomfort with wearing Gryffindor colors.
	It’s hard to tell if Lou loves it, or hates it.
	Oh. He hates it. I would guess that he would actually be a Hufflepuff.
	Abe awaits his turn. I think he’d be a Gryffindor. It was at this point that I started to worry about the destruction of the “costume”, so Ike didn’t get a chance to try it on. That’s okay. Ike has suffered plenty of humiliation with modeling handknits. Happy Halloween!

It used to be that my plan was to move to Austin, and my plan didn’t have any shape beyond that. But because of my friends and this amazing thing called The Online, a better plan is coming into focus.

I have made the greatest connection with Stacy who just opened The Knitting Nest in south Austin. After only knowing me through verypink and a few emails, Stacy asked me to teach knitting classes at her store.

Now I have something to do once I get to Austin. I am so grateful. Not only does Staci own the greatest knitting store in Texas, but she is kind, generous, and sympathetic to my situation. I tell ya, it’s a great connection.

So now I have prep work to do before my move. I need to knit samples for the classes I’ll teach, as well as some shop samples for Stacy. Last time I was in Austin, Stacy sent me home with a metric ton of yarn to get me started. I’m glad that I’m a fast knitter. I have been busy.

Here is just the first of many things in the works…

	This crazy thing. Doesn’t look like much, but it is The Number One pattern in it’s category on Ravelry. This will be a shop sample.
	I’m sure that some of you recognize what this is already. I’m going to to play dumb for a bit. Umm…no.
	In Spanish: No.
	In French: Non.
	In Italian: No.
	In English: Almost!
	Viola! The Baby Surprise Jacket by Elizabeth Zimmermann, from her book The Opinionated Knitter. I swear, it looks nothing like a baby sweater while you’re knitting it. You gotta trust the pattern and press on. Just a couple of seams, some blocking, and a few buttons needed now.
	Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between a bed and a toy. Both are destroyed equally in this house.

Do you remember the Bugs Bunny cartoon with Hansel and Gretel and the witch? The witch had hairpins that flew out every time she ran, and Hansel and Gretel were fat little blond kids with German accents?

Every time the kids said, “We’re Hansel and Gretel!” the other character would say, “Hansel?…Hansel?!” Like they were suddenly surprised and kind of angry to hear the name.

I don’t really get it, either, but it is what I think of whenever I hear “Gretel”.

Speaking of Gretel…

	I finished Gretel. It’s very cute, and it was fun to knit. I could go on and on about how much I like this pattern. But truthfully, this was my second try.
	My first try wasn’t quite as successful. I SWEAR I got gauge. I was surprised that I had to go up three needle sizes to get gauge, especially because I usually have to go down a size or two. I was nearly finished knitting before I tried it on for the first time. It made a good face warmer.
	Back to the good one. The pattern is really pretty, and the designer does such a good job with decreasing while maintaining a cable pattern. Mine is made with one hank of Cascade 220. Ravelry details.
	On to some irritated dogs… Sunday was Basenji Bath Day. This is a BIG DEAL around this house. Since Basenjis clean themselves like cats, baths are only necessary every 6 months or so. After their scrubdown, the two younger dogs believed that running round the house would dry them off…
	…While the two older dogs wanted to go outside to dry in the sun. I can practically hear them saying, “We are wet. We are mad. Let us out NOW.” Angry, perhaps. But they smell like lavender.

Just in time for 90 degree weather…a finished sweater.

Naturally, I have photos of it. But the model was being a total diva bitch during the photoshoot. She was whining and fussing and sweating the whole time.

Okay, that fashion model was ME.

But I can explain! You see, Gus wanted to bask in the sun outside. Since my dogs are never shut out of the house, I had to leave the back door open for him. The a/c was running, but it was still pretty warm inside the house.

Truth be told, I would have had to set the a/c to a much chillier temperature to be comfortable in a wool and alpaca sweater.

	The photoshoot started out okay, but the light wasn’t right…
	The light is a little better, but you still can’t see the sweater…
	Model is looking annoyed and sweaty…
	The light is there, but now the model is in complete diva meltdown. Luckily, there is a much more cooperative model in the house.
	Yay for Anne Boleyn! Pattern: Feeling Feminine from Cast On Magazine, August-October 2007 Yarn: Berroco Ultra Alpaca Notes: The sizing in the pattern was confusing, and I ultimately made more of a jacket than a fitted cardi. Ravelry details
	Love the picot edging.
	I suppose I’ll pack this sweater away for a while. I know I’ll really enjoy it in another couple of months.
	Dogs don’t sweat. Lou’s head, Ike’s head, Abe’s legs.

Laurie Perry made it to Houston on her Drunk, Divorced, and Covered in Cat Hair book tour. Back when I was Sober, Committed, and Covered in Dog Hair I contributed a pattern to her book. Friday was the first time she and I met in person.

I was feeling pretty low that night, but I was really excited to meet her. Laurie knew that I am now Drunk, Divorcing, and Covered in Dog Hair, and she also knew just what I needed.

Laurie gives good hug. She is a sweet thing.

Thanks for the photo, Drew!